This is your Captain speaking………welcome aboard fuckers!!!

MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!  That’s what I said when I saw the headline about LeBron James getting engaged, but even worse when I read that he wasn’t alone.  Michael Jordan is also engaged!!!

I mean goddamn guys!!!  LeBron is 27, he’s got plenty of time to settle down or whatever the fuck you want to call it.  As for Jordan, I just don’t know.  I’d like to think he of all people would know better.  I mean his first marriage cost him $168 million dammit fuck dollars!!!  Now he’s going back for round 2?  You’re Michael Fucking Jordan for crying out loud!!!  Michael doesn’t have to do shit, he can tell some broad, I’m never going to marry you, if that’s a problem then hit the bricks cumbucket!!!

Hasn’t the stories about Kobe and Hulk Hogan reached these guys?  I know it has, especially Kobe’s situation.   But hell, even Hogan…..someone whose ex wife not only took most of his shit, but is now writing a book claiming he beat her……even he got remarried. 

What happened to the natural human reaction of whenever you stick your hand into an open flame and you get burned………you learn not to stick your fucking hand into open flames?!!????!!!!!!!!

I realize that some of these athletes came from nothing and that at one time they were penniless and powerless.  That is no longer the case, but they seem to be carrying that powerless mentality around with them.  Why else would guys like this cave to the wishes of one woman?

I just don’t fucking know fuckers, have you got any theories as to why these guys are continuing to get married despite the sea of evidence surround them? 

You’re now free to drink about the cabin.