Captain No-Marriage Blog

Marriage is a kick in the nuts.

LeBron James needs to Avoid Marriage or share the same fate as Kobe and Jordan.

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on January 2, 2012


This is your Captain speaking………welcome aboard fuckers!!!

MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!  That’s what I said when I saw the headline about LeBron James getting engaged, but even worse when I read that he wasn’t alone.  Michael Jordan is also engaged!!!

I mean goddamn guys!!!  LeBron is 27, he’s got plenty of time to settle down or whatever the fuck you want to call it.  As for Jordan, I just don’t know.  I’d like to think he of all people would know better.  I mean his first marriage cost him $168 million dammit fuck dollars!!!  Now he’s going back for round 2?  You’re Michael Fucking Jordan for crying out loud!!!  Michael doesn’t have to do shit, he can tell some broad, I’m never going to marry you, if that’s a problem then hit the bricks cumbucket!!!

Hasn’t the stories about Kobe and Hulk Hogan reached these guys?  I know it has, especially Kobe’s situation.   But hell, even open fucking flameHogan…..someone whose ex wife not only took most of his shit, but is now writing a book claiming he beat her……even he got remarried. 

What happened to the natural human reaction of whenever you stick your hand into an open flame and you get burned………you learn not to stick your fucking hand into open flames?!!????!!!!!!!!

I realize that some of these athletes came from nothing and that at one time they were penniless and powerless.  That is no longer the case, but they seem to be carrying that powerless mentality around with them.  Why else would guys like this cave to the wishes of one woman?

I just don’t fucking know fuckers, have you got any theories as to why these guys are continuing to get married despite the sea of evidence surround them? 

You’re now free to drink about the cabin.

beer and bitches

6 Responses to “LeBron James needs to Avoid Marriage or share the same fate as Kobe and Jordan.”

  1. Freed Mind said

    LeBron James is completely out of his mind!! I’d have a Wilt Chamberlain-sized harem if I were a 27 year old with that kind of money and fame. These pro athletes should be learning from the late, great Wilt Chamberlain. That guy (allegedly) slept with over 20,000 women….and not a single one was his WIFE!!

  2. themadjewess said

    Capt, ZTM, hacked AGAIN!

  3. Rob said

    LMAO! This was a great post! I’m still laughing at the first 2 sentences!!

    Recently, I saw on Yahoo news an NFL widereciever (NE?) just got engaged. We all wrote comments saying he was an idiot and he better get a prenup. IN 10 years they will all be divorced and broke.

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