Captain No-Marriage Blog

Marriage is a kick in the nuts.

Posts Tagged ‘friendship’

Old Friends

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on May 11, 2010


This is your Captain speaking…………welcome aboard fuckers!!

Old friends………..ever have that chick that you knew way back before all the bs set in between the sexes.  Back when you were just kids.  You kinda keep that fond memory alive over the years, even chat with her every once in a while.

Gentlemen it’s a fucking trap.   Hard to admit, but true.  A very good old friend of mine fits the bill.  She, at one time, was a great girl.  The hardest thing for me to do is to step back and take a honest look, not at the girl I used to know, but at the woman that is now there.

She was a petite, very cute blond, still is in fact.  But tell me is this story sounds familiar…..she got knocked up by a few bad boys and now she suddenly wants a real relationship.  Now she wants a “good guy”.  Now she wants someone to come in and be Captain Save-A-Hoe.

Fellas, the image of this former friend is one that has been made up over the years, please do not fall for this illusion.  The girl you knew is long gone, dead.  What you see now is just a shell, I know the memories are powerful, but trust me.  Your friend is dead, what is left is your typical American cunt.

I know it’s hard, but you have to take a step back and look at how she acts.  Granted there may even be flashes of what used to be when you were kids, but that’s all it is, just a flash in the pan.  What was once there has long since evaporated!  Don’t try to capture the past, just let it be and move on, in the end you will be happy that you did instead of settling like most people.

You’re now free to bang about the country.

Posted in Marriage, money, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

This just in……….Marriage still sucks balls!!!

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on May 5, 2009


Why, oh why did I ever give up the freedom of living alone?

On top of that marriage will shrink your social circle quicker than 50 degree water will shrink your nutsack. And God forbid you want to have friends of your own. Mutual friends are worthless because they amount to nothing more than eyes and ears for the wife when she’s not around.

But what do I miss the most about living alone? Sex with different women? Doing whatever I want, whenever I want?

No, what I miss most is the silence. I miss not being criticized and nit-picked to death at every turn. If women are such great multi-taskers, then why the hell can’t they just learn how to sit down and shut the fuck up.

Till next time, this is your Captain speaking.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

 
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