Captain No-Marriage Blog

Marriage is a kick in the nuts.

Posts Tagged ‘michael jackson’

When “Porn Star” actually met something.

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on November 23, 2009


This is your Captain speaking……..welcome aboard fuckers!

Back in my day…………………ok don’t panic this isn’t going to be a rose colored glasses trip down memory lane, but it will be a comparison to demonstrate how our standards on the whole as men has gone straight down the shitter.

Back in the 80’s and 90’s if I said “Porn Star”, it actually meant something.

You would have gotten a clear picture of what a porn star looked like.  Regardless of the race if a chick was a porn star, there were certain qualities that you could count on, the main one was of course was a kick ass body.  Nice face, perfect ass, great tits (whether natural or aftermarket bolt-ons), and no muffin tops!

Now don’t get me wrong, I fucking love the internet, it provides a forum for everyone, whether through a blog such as this or through a site like YouTube or even the adult version of “tube” sites.  Now, anyone can porn star.

There has been an explosion of homemade porn stars, many with less than desirable bodies.  Now I understand the appeal of seeing a “regular” chick, one like the attractive, but not necessarily smoking chick that lives a couple doors down.  However the latest wave of BBW and over-sized ass porn is proof of how American men have lowered their standards as to what “hot” is.

Its one thing for a flick with a girl next door type, but not if the girl next door has mounds of cellulite all over her ass and thighs, that’s just being desperate, remember porn is suppose to be about fantasy.  Fat chicks are a dime a dozen, lazy bitches are everywhere!

What’s worse is that I see guys fawn all over out of shape, overweight chicks all the time.  We have collectively lowered the bar and with women being the laziest creatures on the fucking planet, they will only do the bare minimum to get by.

The other sad part is a lot of these overweight porn queens would actually be pretty hot if they could just get the fucking fork out of their mouth and find a treadmill. But then again, we see this in everyday life, a muffin top who has potential, but because she’s already getting attention from a bunch of thirsty, desperate guys, she does nothing to improve or take it to the next level.

Gentlemen……..fuckers………….we need to cut this bullshit out.  We need to raise our standards and our level of game.  Yes we all have our slump-busters that we aren’t proud of; I’m not talking about that.  I’m talking about all this fat bitch worship.  If you have ever put the words “beautiful” and “BBW” in the same sentence, then please do us all a favor and fucking kill yourself.

This one case where I have to agree with the Expats, foreign women get it, they know that the game is never over, it’s a lesson that’s been long forgotten by the jizz-traps over here in the States.

You’re now free to watch Jenna.

Posted in sex, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments »

Women plan to do fucking nothing!

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on November 18, 2009


This is your Captain speaking………welcome aboard fuckers.

As I was making my way back from lunch today, I ran into a female co-worker from my old dept.  This chick used to be a smoking hot blond with an awesome body.  Of course she was single then……..now a married woman, she has chunked up, cut her hair and constantly complains of migraines and other medical issues.


The latest revelation from this chunkster is that she is going to law school, not really a new claim, but considering that she’s been in community college for over 3 years does leave some doubt to her claim.  She also said that she wants kids in the future.

So let’s review and pretend that she does actually go to law school one day.  She’ll graduate with tons of debt then have a kid, no career established and her “lucky” husband will be left with not only her massive student loans but the cost of raising the little crumb crunchers that she wants.  Typical American lazy bitch, doesn’t want real work, just wants to satisfy her own little fantasy that exists only in her overweight jizzed trapped mind.  I can see why the other guy she was with ran like hell when the idea of marriage came up.

That guy had it right, wear the pussy out while she’s hot, the guy now has a fat, gassy, cranky version of what she used to be and he gets to pay all the bills!  Wow, sign me up for that!

You’re now free to drink about the cabin!



Posted in Marriage, money, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

Indifference………Bitches hate it!

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on November 10, 2009


This is your Captain speaking…………welcome aboard fuckers!

A few posts back I talked about how I was called a woman hater because I did not want to risk getting fucked again by remarrying.  A reader, Curiepoint, left these very truthful comments:

“The shaming language is a call to get you to embrace “normalcy”. That is to say, that the normal and
predictable thing for a man to do is to assume the yoke of an oppressive marriage, ungrateful children, and
mounting debt. To refuse all this is to buck the system, and we can’t have any of that.
I have ask rhetorically though, what is the difference between love and hate? Both have caused pain,
death, and misery in roughly equal proportions. Both carry a heavier price than is ever worth paying, and
neither deliver on any of the promises that they make. Why bother with either one?
The thing for these accusatory voices to realize, is that we do not hate women. That would assume that
they can trigger an emotional response in us. The real issue is our indifference to them, which is
diametrically opposed to both love and hate.

The shaming language is a call to get you to embrace “normalcy”.  That is to say, that the normal and predictable thing for a man to do is to assume the yoke of an oppressive marriage, ungrateful children, andmounting debt. To refuse all this is to buck the system, and we can’t have any of that.I have ask rhetorically though, what is the difference between love and hate? Both have caused pain,death, and misery in roughly equal proportions.  Both carry a heavier price than is ever worth paying, andneither deliver on any of the promises that they make. Why bother with either one?  The thing for these accusatory voices to realize, is that we do not hate women. That would assume thatthey can trigger an emotional response in us. The real issue is our indifference to them, which isdiametrically opposed to both love and hate.”

It was his last sentence that stuck with me.  I have referred to a certain rebound piece of ass before in this blog and after the sex ended with this bitch, her complaint, the thing that drove her completely fucking wild was my indifference toward her.  She tried all her usual drama queen tactics on me, but to no effect.  This drove her insane, she even told me so!  She said that at least if I hate her that she can understand that.

Typical American bitch, everything revolves around her, the fact that I wasn’t feeding this cunt’s drama machine totally pissed her off even more.

I think it was more than indifference.  This chick was last single in her 20’s, now she’s pushing 40 so her stock has crashed long ago and I think that she just can’t deal with that.  I think that these entitlement whores cannot imagine the day when stomping their little feet no longer works and guys just don’t give a fuck because there’s something younger, hotter and with a better attitude right around the corner.

Silly cum bucket, tricks are for kids.  I am indifferent because I have choices……and you don’t.  Enjoy the rest of your miserable life you overweight loud-mouthed bitch!

You are now free to drink malt liquor about the cabin.


Posted in Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

To the young guys.

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on September 19, 2009


This is your Captain speaking……….welcome aboard fuckers.

This is a message for all the younger guys out there.  I know it sucks because attractive women your age are not giving you the time of day right now, but trust me.  Keep working on your career and your dreams and you will be amazed at how great your life will be.  You have NO idea how successful you can or will be when you’re 19, 20 or even 25.  The last thing you want to do is to get bogged down with some bitch and even worse if you knock the bitch up.

I’m not saying that you have to pay for pussy like a hooker, although there is some truth to that, but what I’m saying is that the more successful you become, the more doors will open and the more options you will have in your life.  Not just with women, but with every aspect of your life.

It kills me to see young guys settle for some local piece of ass that they knocked up and end up giving up all their hopes and dreams, just to slave away to support some bitch and “do the right thing”.  Well, that’s the wrong fucking thing gentlemen!

Don’t shoot yourself in the foot by settling down with your highschool sweetheart.  Don’t date single mothers and do not have a serious relationship until AFTER you have realized your dreams.  Even then, a serious relationship offers no benefits to a guy that he cant get by banging multiple women.

Stay true to yourselves guys, don’t fall into the money pit of marriage and kids.  Live your life the way that you want it and not how some bitch is nagging you to live it.

Until next time fuckers.

You’re now free to move about Wall Street.

Posted in Marriage, money, pua, sex, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Why bother moving out of your parent’s place?

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on August 15, 2009


This is your Captain speaking,

My question is not to suggest that people never move out. It is in reference to the fact that when a man gets married, he ends up right back in the same situation he was in when he was 16.

The place really isn’t his, he damn sure can’t set up the house like he wants, the bitch decorates. He has to ask permission for his friends to come over to watch the fight and God forbid that he wants to go over to that friend’s house that she doesn’t like. Yep, like 16 all over again, feeling trapped and looking forward to moving the fuck out.

Who do women act like a man’s mother? Who the fuck is telling them that this a good idea? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, one mother is enough!! Women, especially American women are just a bunch of mentally unbalanced, controlling bitches and men need to learn that women really are good for one thing, sex. Fuck em’ and chuck em’.

Men need to lose this scarcity mindset and realize than there’s a constant stream of new pieces of ass turning 18 every fucking day!!!

super-hot-thong

Don’t give in to these war pigs that you have to drink 4 quarts of malt liquor just to be able to look at her mismatched, discolored, sagging tits.

warpig-thumb

fat-girl-thong

Let’s step it up and let’s step out and make one final move out into our own place again! And once you have your freedom gentlemen, NEVER give it up again. If a chick wants to move in then it’s time for you to move on.   Kick her ever-expanding ass to the fucking curb!

You’re now free to grab your shit and go!

Posted in Marriage, pua, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Who lies more? Men or Women?

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on July 19, 2009


This is your Captain speaking, welcome aboard fuckers……….

Ok, so some of you might recognize the title of this post as a pickup line or opener used to chat up women.  But I’m actually asking the question.  When it comes to dating and relationships it’s obvious that women are the lie.  It was Albert Einstein who said “Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not…”

Women put up the classic dog and pony show when you first meet them.  Then once they have you locked down either by marriage or by squeezing out a baby, that’s when they change.  Well not change, more like go back to their real slobby selves.

How often have you heard women talk about losing weight for their wedding?  And that’s exactly what they do, they lose the weight for that ONE day, then they pork up like the pigs they really are.  Plus, why aren’t they losing weight for the so-called love of their life?  Don’t they love the guy enough to lose the fat for more than one day.  Of course most American women are just way to fucking lazy to do that, it’s much easier for the fat pig to point to her wedding picture and say “see what I USED to look like”.

hotrussianbrides

For the guy the wedding picture is a reminder of how he fell for the classic bait and switch routine.  Hopefully some of these guys will use those pictures as reminders of who really does lie more!  That poor smuck actually thought he was getting the girl in the wedding pictures!!  Instead he got a fatter and more hostile version of the woman that he first met.  That’s why guys cheat, not to get something new, but to get something like they thought they had in the first place!

fat_lady

There is no benefit for a man to get married, unless he’s a complete loser.

You’re now free to drink about the cabin…..

Posted in Marriage, pua, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Are you Married to a SNIPER???

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on July 15, 2009


This is your Captain speaking……..

What’s up fuckers!  How many of you guys watch fights, either boxing or mma?  Ever notice how the guys throw tons of jabs and cut kicks.  Those punches and kicks never knock anyone out, but the damage from them adds up over the course of the fight.  You can’t really say it was one particular jab or kick that really made the guy hurt.

So anyone here married to a fucking sniper?

natasha-red-alert-3

Women fight in the same manner.  Often when they say “Well what have I done…”, you can’t pinpoint one incident, but you KNOW you’ve had the hell beaten out of you.

Like today, I’m home pretty much the same time every day and I unwind a minute before I go to the gym, the same gym I’ve been going to for YEARS.  Well the gas company was going to replace our regulator outside and needed someone to be here.  Well wifey decides to play the hero (the bitch just wanted to leave work early) because she said that “I’m not reliable”.

That’s what makes marriage so fucking evil.  Little shit like that the builds up, the constant fucking slick ass remarks when you’re out in public, all that shit adds up.  You can’t remember individual stuff, but just like the fight, it takes its toll.

Let’s dump these passive agressive bitches and use women what they were put here for……SEX.  No, not fucking babies, just sex.  Let some other sucker knock the bitch up, we just want the pussy.

You are now free to move about my ballsack.

Posted in Marriage, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Don’t want to get married? Then you must be a woman-hater!!!

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on July 8, 2009


Hello Fuckers, This is your Captain Speaking……..

You know, it’s amazing.  You hear a lot about how we should learn from our mistakes.  Well, marriage has been the single most costly mistake I have ever made and I fucking refuse to do it again.  You would think that people would say that’s a wise choice.  After all, why repeat the biggest blunder of your life?

Well that’s not how some women see it.  Although not all women, once again the split among the women is predictable.  My younger hotter friends agree with my outlook and say that I should enjoy my life, the old bags over 30 who are carrying around 50 extra pounds, whiny shrill voices, they all tell me how sad it is.

Sad?  Sad that I’m smart enough to not repeat a mistake, which by the way, 2nd and 3rd marriages have even HIGHER divorce rates than first marriages!!  The truth is that these older bags are way past their sell by date and I am just entering my prime.  It seems like every day I have younger and hotter girls talking to me.  The old bags probably stomped their little feet when they were younger when they didn’t get their way and men fell for it…………until the looks slipped, the pounds added up, then the guys shifted their attention to younger, hotter and less bitchy women.

These bitter old cunts tell me that just because I don’t want to sign another contract to give away half my assets, that I must “hate women”.  Well they must hate men.   After all, why else would they try so hard to sell something that many of them have already failed at.  Yeah, some of these bitches telling me not to give up on marriage are divorced themselves!  Fucking hippocrites!

Fuck those overweight cunts.  I plan to get divorced and NEVER give up my happiness again.  NEVER have to worry about which personality I’ll come home to.  NEVER feel like I am 16 and still live at home.

Fellas, I say let these fat, bitter old war pigs live at home with their fucking 7 cats.  I will have standards.  NO AVERAGE WOMEN!!!!  And damn sure never limit myself to just one or two women.  It will be time to live and enjoy life, like a man should.

Fuck marriage and fuck used up old battle cunts.

You are now free to bang porn stars about the cabin….

Posted in Marriage, sex, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

Thugtician Classic

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on July 5, 2009


Happy 4th Fuckers, this is your Captain speaking……

This man is right on point.  Women hate guys like this, he doesn’t yell, he speaks well, and worst of all he uses logic.

Look him up on youtube, search for “Thugt1cian”, his other account got deleted by the feminist bitches.  Damn cunts hate the truth.

Thugtician Classic: Delusional Women

One last thing, God bless our troops.

You’re now free due to the sacrifice of a veteran………..

3h4upsc6ik

Posted in Marriage, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Sexual Myths and other feminist crap

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on July 2, 2009


This is your Captain Speaking……..

Ever been around some women and heard the old bullshit line about how women are at their “sexual peak” in their mid to late thirties?  That they are in the “prime” of their worthless lives.  What a crock of shit.  Of course its usually below average, overweight women who are making this comment.

Let’s talk about who peaks when.  Men and women peak opposite of each other.  Women peak around 18-20 and quickly go downhill after that.  The 19yr old guy is pretty much worthless in the dating world, but fast-forward 20 years and the tables turn.  Now the 39 yr old guy has his career going and is getting approached by that 18-22 age group that didn’t even know he was alive when he was that age.

Of course the woman, even if she works out, which is rare, is barely a shell of what she used to look like.  The only guys her age who want her are guys with very few if any options as far as dating women.  I don’t care how hot a chick is at 22, she won’t be near as hot at 32 and especially after they squeeze out a few rugrats.

So to make up for the fact that the only thing most women ever had going for them (youth) is now long gone, they make up this sexual prime myth.  Nice try cunts, that’s like trying to call a Ford Pinto a Jaguar.

average american woman

So guys, don’t fall for these overweight, overbearing, loudmouthed bitches, just skip these warpigs and fuck their 19yr old daughters.  But you better hurry, women these days aren’t wasting any time when it comes to packing on the fucking pounds.

You are now free to gangbang the sky cunts.

Posted in sex, Uncategorized, women | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

 
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