Captain No-Marriage Blog

Marriage is a kick in the nuts.

Posts Tagged ‘Playboy’

Playboy Playmates are no Exception

Posted by Capt. No-Marriage on June 26, 2012


90s playboy cover

This is your Captain speaking……..welcome aboard fuckers!

So the net and entertainment shows are a buzz about Jenny Mccarthy posing for play boy at just a few months shy of being 40.  So fucking what?  For one Playboy is notorious for their photoshopping and airbrushing skills.  We all know that when it comes to Playboy what we see is not what we get. 

And to all the old hags who look at Jenny and think that they too can still be Playboy hot at 40…….you dumb broads need to wake the fuck up.  Let’s do a quick comparison here. 

First Jenny back around 1993 when she was hot……

jenny mccarthy when she was hot

Now let’s look at over the hill Jenny.

jenny mccarthy now

Pretty clear isn’t it?  Yes even if I look at a more “flattering” picture of her one thing is clear……women do NOT get hotter as they age.  That’s why they try to rope you into marriage as soon as fucking possible with what little bit of looks they do have in their 20s.  They know that shit is short lived!

Although they don’t like to admit that they know it.  This is obviously a last ditch ego boost for Ms Mccarthy as the dives off the cliff.  Now I’m not saying that 40yr old Jenny isn’t worth a quick bone, but that’s all it’d be worth.  And the fact is she is in the top 1% of American women as far as looks, that’s the sad fucking part.  This is our fucking best and we still look like horse jizz next to the other countries.

So guys, no matter how hot your little girlfriend is now, take a good look, hell you better take lots of pictures too because as each day passes, so does her beauty.  That’s why she’s trying to lock you in with marriage and/or fucking rugrats.  Don’t fall for this smoke and mirrors donkey-show these broads are putting on.

The best thing guys can do with women is to treat them the same way Seal Team 6 treated Osama Bin Laden.  Go in under the cover of darkness, hit the target fast and hard, then fade off into the night sky. 

Ignore all the feel good bullshit out there, women do not improve with age.  Yes I know there are some porkers who don’t get off their ass and lose the weight until their 30s but if they hadn’t been so fucking lazy and lost the weight early on (or never gained it) then they would have been hotter when they were younger.  All women are hotter at 20 than at 40, yes they can still  be fuckable, but some of us drink a lot and therefore fuckable is a moving target.

You’re now free to hop into your hot tub time machine and go back and fuck Jenny Mccarthy when she was smoking hot. 

tits and hot tubs

Posted in Captain No Marriage, sex, Single mothers, women | Tagged: , , | 12 Comments »

 
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